Another New Years eve rolls around and as you reflect on the year that is coming to close you might begin to notice as things end, new things are beginning. T. S. Eliot wrote that, “to make an end is to make a beginning.”
Because we don't often we look across our lives in chunks of time we might feel quite nostalgic about 2018. Before setting any New Year goals it's helpful to reflect on our collective achievements and how we have grown not just as individuals but as people. How did you contribute throughout the year and how does it makes you feel about who you are, where you have come from and where you are going?
In Life Coaching I sometimes see people struggling to achieve the goals they set at the start of the year, quite often I'll hear "New Years resolutions are a waste of time." What do you think and how do you feel about New Years resolutions? I've personally and professionally enjoyed the opportunity to participate in the ritual of reflecting and reassessing my life plans around this time of year either on my own, with my partner and family or with my clients in private practice and the workplace. I can reflect now and see that without life plans I don't think I would have achieved what I call an "authentic life." I would like to share with you some professional coaching tips to help you be more effective in not only making your New Years resolutions for 2019 but making them meaningful and authentic.
The New Years resolutions that fail are quite often reactive to the things we feel we didn't do for some reason or another; for example we might believe we have over indulged our eating this year and want to eat less and have a goal to try and loose a specific amount of weight. We might set an ideal weight goal in hope we can turn our habit of over eating around. But maybe this goal is driven by something much deeper than how we imagine we might look and feel in a new swimsuit we saw an influencer wearing on IG and our unhelpful habit of reaching for junk food unconsciously.
Authentic big vision coaching requires us to look beyond our reactive habits and superficial drivers and dive in deep, align and commit with discipline to a version of who we are and who we want to become that is whole. Knowing behavioural patterns that are habitual can certainly help us because these can often be the obstacles that keep us separated from our goals. The key to accepting we all have habits that don't really support our wellbeing is found somewhere between compassion and equanimity and the key to minimising the impact is balance and self-discipline.
Being able to clarify what we truly value and what we find meaningful is the best way to craft a big vision for life and work. It can be difficult to truly know what you want in the future and it's not something you do casually. It's really important to unpack your wants and needs to understand the longing of your heart in a way that can nourish, support and sustain.
In my 15 years of coaching and self-reflection on the mindfulness pathway I have come to know some deep insights on the true nature of what nourishes, supports and sustains the human life. I would also like to acknowledge these insights have come to me through the gentle but skilful guidance of wise teachings, coaches and mentors who have nurtured this way of seeing within me for many years. It's through these teachings I can reflect on the 42 years I've walked the earth and hopefully craft the words to share something meaningful with you all. The answers are not found within who we think we are individually but in our collective environments, communities and relationships. In 2019 my big vision will be crafted around this insight and my deepest longing is to continue to connect and align authentically with this wisdom and to skilfully coach individuals and workplaces in a way that can facilitate this learning in them too.
A powerful coaching tool can help you get started on a big vision for 2019 is called the BIG Vision Map and I invite you to make this a yearly ritual you do with another person/s to hold you accountable. The worksheet will ask you specific questions to reflect on your behaviours, emotions, thoughts and values as you get really clear on what will make a big difference to your New Year. You may download the BIG Vision Map tool for FREE from the Melbourne Coach website. If you complete this worksheet and would like to have a complimentary call about how coaching can help you navigate 2019, drop me an email to schedule in a time.
Wishing you all a meaningful 2019 X Marion Miller.